Pearls of Wisdom

Tournaments are so dang much fun. I mean, Mox Pearl isn't the best of moxes, but it'd still be cool to win, and I'd definitely pay $15 to play Magic for seven hours any day of the week but especially on Sunday.

The epic that is this most recent tournament started around 10:30 the night before, when Adam called me to confirm his and Anthony’s reservation on my living room floor for that night. Anthony was supposed to get off work and they expected to arrive around 12:30 or 1 am. I called them around 1:30 to find out that they were still an hour away. At 2:30, they called me and based on their surroundings I told them that they had missed their exit and were going even further in the wrong direction.

So, apparently, Adam and Anthony are really bad at finding landmarks and even after I had given them impeccable directions back to where they should be, they were still lost and going in a different, though still absolutely wrong, way. I went outside to find them and they, at long last they parked, unloaded their car, and we went to my apartment.

I think we were all pretty tired—I know I was (I spent most of that day helping my girlfriend move out of her college apartment)—so we slept after only a few hours of catch-up and Magic discussion. The biggest thing we came up with was the application of Propaganda against Ichorid, but more on that later. Anthony also mentions that if he doesn’t call his boss and beg to keep his job at 6 am, he’ll definitely get fired.

I set my alarm early, hoping to be able to get up and do some playtesting, take a shower, eat breakfast, and do other preparatory things. Then I came to my senses and set my alarm for later. The tournament wasn’t scheduled to start until 11:30, so I figured 10 would be plenty early.

At 9:13, Jeff called to tell me he was on the road from Toledo to Columbus and would make it in time.

“Awesome. Good driving,” I said, silently cursing him for waking me up 45 minutes early.

Then I got up and showered, and walked to the grocery store to get some eggs, milk, and orange juice for breakfast.

Anthony had already lost his job, but he’s unconscious and doesn’t know it.

When I got back, I made some changes to my deck, mostly proxying Propaganda and adding it to the sideboard. Then I tried to quietly make scrambled cheesey-eggs and some caramel rolls—a breakfast of champions. I woke Anthony and Adam up and we feasted.

They put their decks together while I did some test draws with Oath, because that’s a fun deck to playtest. Anthony made a last minute call to play Tog, and Adam went with his deck of choice, UW Fish that he calls Moatopia, but everyone really knows it’s just UW Fish. This time he packed Propagandas in the sideboard.

Jeff called me while we were working on that and said that he was ready to go whenever. He was packing Menendian’s Ichorid build minus the Crop Rotation, plus a Balance. We go to pick him up and nearly die when an SUV tries to play chicken with my Honda. I’m pretty sure I won that one because he turned left while I held my ground.

There is some debate as to which direction we turn on High Street to get to the Soldiery. I decide to turn left and am correct and therefore vindicated. Jeff has a terrible sense of direction. If he were a homing pigeon, he would probably die.

In the parking lot of the Soldiery, Justin and some Warzone gamers are waiting for us. We’re there slightly after the slated 11:30 registration time, but the doors are still closed. As nice a venue as the Soldiery is to play games, the owner seems, um, not very good at customer relations. Like, he’s an okay guy and an enthusiastic seller, but his prices are absolutely ridiculous and the fact that he was late for a tournament opening is just bad form.

Shortly before noon, he arrives and opens the doors. We go inside and register our decks, along with, like, 90% of team Meandeck. I write down my UB Fish deck and note that Justin designed it as a joke. Justin registers the BlackStax deck we’ve been working on for a while. It’s like Fish and Stax had a baby and garners us a lot of attention over the course of the tournament. I know you’ve all seen my deck before, and his deck did better anyway, so I’ll post his instead:

5x Moxen
1x Black Lotus
1x Sol Ring
8x Swamp
2x Bloodstained Mire
3x Polluted Delta
4x Wasteland
1x Strip Mine

4x Dark Confidant
4x Braids, Cabal Minion
3x Hypnotic Specter
3x Withered Wretch

4x Dark Ritual
2x Cabal Ritual
1x Necropotence
1x Demonic Tutor
1x Vampiric Tutor
1x Darkblast
1x Diabolic Edict
3x Crucible of Worlds
4x Duress
3x Null Rod
4x Chalice of the Void

It's something like that anyway. I don't remember what all we proxied and put in there.
Menendian commands that registration ends at 12:30 and we all follow the order of Menendian.

The parings go up and we shuffle for:

Round 1

My paring against Control Slaver should be really good, and I’m not sure my opponent, Eric, was very familiar with the deck anyway, so I really think I would have won this one had it not been for my first stupid, stupid mistake resolving Duress on my first turn. His first turn consisted of Volcanic Island, Mana Vault go. He had another couple of lands and a Welder and a Sundering Titan that I conveniently and unfortunately ignored since I couldn’t take them anyway. The cards I could take included Crucible of Worlds, Fact or Fiction, and something else that really wasn’t going to be bad like Chain of Vapor or something. I took Fact or Fiction, not wanting him to improve his hand. Next turn, he went Crucible, Strip Mine. I played it out because I’m Fish and don’t need a lot of mana, but, really, that game was over as soon as my Duress hit the yard.

In game two I got an early Bob and went for the card advantage beatdown with no problems whatsoever. I had counters for his big stuff and Null Rod for his moxes. His deck never got off the ground. I sided in an extra Duress, two Tormod’s Crypts, and two Energy Flux. I should also note that his Mana Crypt dealt him more damage than I did, though.

We started game three with five minutes left in the round. I was on the lookout for the quick kill with Darksteel Colossus or Tendrils, but he never found it before our five minutes and then our five turns was up, so we drew.

Jeff went 2-1 against Grim Long, Justin went 2-0, Anthony went 0-2, and Adam went 2-0. I’m 1-1-1, which is fine by me, although I’m still kicking myself over that first turn bonk that I probably could have won had I actually looked at his hand.

Round 2

I played the UW Fish deck that wasn’t Adam’s. This is pretty bad for me since he’s got bigger creatures and more reactive control. Duresses don’t work very well against Meddling Mage, which makes me unhappy. In game one he gets an aggressive draw and hits me with a True Believer and Ninja of the Deep Hours disguised as Isamaru then hits me with Isamaru and a ninja then rides his card advantage to victory even though I do get some creature beats in. At two life I had to Force his Azorius Guildmage to be able to block the rest of his attack, and I died after my own dead draw. As bad as Duress is against creatures, his creatures are also bigger and faster than mine.

In game 2 I drop a first turn Propaganda off a Black Lotus and hope to threaten his mana with an early Stifle. I think this is a fairly strong start, but the Propaganda makes this game look much like the last one only in slow motion. I drew lots of cards thanks to Bob and a ninja of my own, but I had to use them to block eventually and was left defenseless except for a lone Umezawa’s Jitte, which he Pithing Needled on his last turn.

That makes me 1-3-1 and unhappy-face.

Round 3

This is probably my favorite match and the most interesting one for me. I played against Belcher, which is a deck that has intrigued me of late and I have been collecting cards for. My opponent, Michael Simister, was quite knowledgeable about the deck, and that makes sense since he invented the whole dang deal back in 2004. Anyway, I keep a five-land hand against him in game one and he goes Wheel of Fortune, Welder, Belcher. I Wasteland his Tropical Island on my turn, but he already had the Bayou in his hand, so I lose anyway.

In the second game, I get to set up a bit and transmute for a Null Rod on him after Duressing a Channel and Forcing one of his other big mana spells. I get out a Dark Confidant and ride the card advantage to victory by drawing just about everything in my deck that would be good against him. I don’t remember if Belcher runs Yawgmoth’s Will, but just in case it does, I take his graveyard starting with Channel, Necropotence, and Black Lotus.

Game three goes pretty much like game one did except that he knows what I’m playing and sides in Darksteel Colossus; I side in Diabolic Edict in response. He played a first-turn Belcher with three mana open and elected to Tinker for Memory Jar instead of going for my dome with Belcher or going for Colossus as the easy win. His Jar is horrendous and I use the Force of Will I found in the jar on his Lions Eye Diamond to keep him from winning first turn. Unfortunately, my real hand is weak except for Stifle, which holds him off for one activation. I die on turn three.

I talked to him a little about his deck afterwards, and his biggest advice to me when playing Two-Land Belcher was just to look for lots of mana, not to even worry about finding threats. I haven’t tried this yet, but I will. When I asked him why he didn’t just activate the Belcher on his first turn of game three instead of Tinkering for Memory Jar, he said matter-of-factly that he still had a land in the deck. I thought at the time that I probably would have played it anyway, figuring that he still had pretty good odds of going off then. Afterwards, I realized that would mean going down to two useable mana for next turn, which wouldn’t guarantee him a second activation. Like I said, he knows the deck.

While Anthony and I continue losing, Jeff, Justin and Adam keep up their winning ways. I’m surprised that no one prepared much for Ichorid, especially seeing how it was hyped after Richmond. Oh well. That’s awesome for Jeff!

For now, though, I’m 2-5-1, which is, what, Carven Caryatid?

Round 4

The weird thing was, there was more than one Belcher deck in attendance at this tournament. Who knew Belcher would turn out in force at one 30-person tournament?

Anyway, my fourth round opponent, John, was not as good at Belcher as my third round opponent. He blamed it on bad luck, but I have a feeling he just kept two shaky hands. We played two games, and he got first turn Belcher in both but was never able to carry it through for a victory.

In game one he plays the Belcher but has no draw and poops out when I Wasteland his Bayou on my turn, cutting him from one mana to zero. Second turn I drop a Null Rod and am able to keep that online until I get a Dark Confidant out to put him on a clock and deliver the win.

Game three sees another first turn Belcher but no activation. When he Land Grants, I write his cards down, check them off as he goes, and know that I have to keep him off of Cabal Ritual mana for the victory. On my first turn I rip Black Lotus like a champ to drop Energy Flux on him and Strip Mine his Bayou. When I get Null Rod a few turns later, he scoops.

He was a nice guy about it, and I felt bad about handing him his fourth loss. We did some trading afterwards, so now I’m, like, 6 cards away from being able to play Belcher myself.

If round four is the one where Anthony had the bye, then everyone in our group had a win this round. Seriously, though, it sucks having a bye. Nobody wants to pay money to show up, lose a bunch, and then not play. Who cares if you get a match win for it? You’re still not having any fun.

Excited about the prospects of three of our players getting into the top-eight, we head into round five with high expectations, especially since I’m now a slightly more respectable 4-5-1 and am Sloggering all over the place.

Round 5

I played against Sam and his Stax. Sam seemed like a nice guy, but he was definitely disappointed about ending up at the high-numbered tables. Unfortunately, I think unless you’re Roland Chang (who top-foured) Stax just wasn’t going to go anywhere in this tournament.

In game one, I draw really, really good stuff and take damage only from myself. Dark Confidant feeds me cards and I’m dealing him damage with Bob and Ninja in no time. He hits me six turns in a row with Gorilla Shaman while I keep the rest of him in check. My opponent draws low on useable colored mana (getting three Mishra’s Workshops instead) and high on colored cards that I can keep him out of with Null Rod. For a Stax game this went pretty quickly.

I side in Energy Fluxes and Chains of Vapor against him for game two and manage to get a first turn Flux off a Lotus, but he plays around it with Welder tricks eventually locking me in place with Trinisphere and gunning me down with Triskelion. The game took a while, but I really couldn’t draw anything that worked against him once he stopped having to cast spells.

Game three went to the last five turns but I again managed to keep him in check and let his Mana Crypt do most of the work for me. Had he thought to Welder that out on his last turn instead of losing the flip at two life, he probably could have come back to win the game. I was low on life, creatures, and land and was staring down Karn. Luckily for me, I lost the die roll at the beginning of the match and was therefore owed one by the Fates.

And thus I end my day at 6-6-1, which would be sweet if it were Akroma or Simic Sky Swallower, but I think in my case it’s more like Johtull Wurm. Oh well. There are more important things going on:

Jeff top-eighted with Ichorid.

Justin top-eighted with BlackStax.

Adam top-eighted with UW Fish.

Since this is already getting a little long, though, I think I’ll quit for now and pick up at a later date with reports on the rest of the evening.

Just to let you know, though, it’s really good so you should probably (definitely) check back tomorrow or otherwise soon. As a preview the results are, Played Roland Chang, Played Combo, Played Combo. Make of that what you will.

For some comments on my deck, continue on now.

I really, really liked the addition of Ninjas. I know I was worried about them having a higher mana cost than, well, every two things in my deck that aren’t named Force of Will, but that’s okay, they draw me cards and therefore make my Confidants that much better. I maindecked Drowned and Plagued Rusalkas in the hopes of going first turn creature to Ninja, but I’m not even sure if I needed to. I ended up Ninjutsuing Bob just as often.

I should also note that I found Force of Will with Dark Confidant twice and won both games. I’ll go on record now as saying that’s totally worth it.

What I really need to do, I think is improve my game against aggro, probably by adding Carnophage instead of the Rusalkas and get a better game against combo by giving myself a group of Chalices of the Void in the board.

Otherwise, I seriously think that UB Fish is really, really, oh so very close to breaking out and doing really well. If I play smarter, it’ll work. The metagame has shifted away from Stax (which should be kind of bad for me, though I’m 1-0-1 against it) to Control Slaver, Gifts, and Combo, all of which I should be able to handle easily. I think Withered Wretch has more potential than True Believer, Bob is amazing, and Duress is just as good, if not better than, Mana Drains.

I’ve got the tools and I’ll fix everything this weekend.