Nat vs. the Volcanos

I’d like to say that my copious notes were useful in putting this report together, but I can’t. Somewhere between Detroit and Toledo I lost one page of scores, and somewhere between Toledo and Columbus I lost the other, so I’ve pretty much got nothing but memories right now.

Sorry.

Apparently I am bested by mid-sized Midwestern cities and travel between them.

Not to mention Counter-Goblins.

Apparently everyone is bested by Counter-Goblins, though.

I hope I didn’t spoil the surprise…

Anyway, I wake up Saturday morning nice and early at 8:30 a.m. after going to bed at 11 p.m. the night before. I think that qualifies me as well-rested for the tournament. Registration starts at noon, but I told Dave that I’d help him out before the tournament and show up about an hour early. My morning mostly involves scrambled eggs and Saturday morning cartoons. (Johnny Test FTW?) It’s fairly relaxed, and I head out around 10:40 for the Gamers Lounge in Sandusky.

On the way, I listen to the end of Car Talk (where I learned what kind of car I should drive to get a man) and talked to my girlfriend, who assured me I didn’t need a nice car to impress her. (Honda Civic FTW?)

Dave and I talk about how things should go for a little while, what we’re expecting, and what the chances are for upcoming tournaments—more on that later. Then I get down to making my deck: UbaCaps.

4x Mishra’s Workshop
4x Mountains
4x Barbarian Ring
3x Wastelands
1x Strip Mine
1x Tolarian Academy
5x Moxen
1x Mana Crypt
1x Mana Vault
1x Sol Ring
1x Black Lotus

4x Bazaar of Baghdad
4x Uba Mask
4x Crucible of Worlds
4x Chalice of the Void
4x Jester’s Cap
3x Tangle Wire
3x Sphere of Resistance
1x Trinisphere

4x Goblin Welder
1x Karn, Silver Golem
1x Duplicant
1x Solemn Simulacrum

Sideboard

3x Granite Shard
3x Pyroblast
3x Tormod’s Crypt
2x Red Elemental Blast
2x Viashino Heretic
1x Sundering Titan
1x Triskelion

See all those four-ofs and redundant cards? That’s why I love this deck. As for my sideboard, the only thing I was really happy about were the 5 REB effects. Next time more Heretics!

My cousin Jeff gets to the store after too long, registers his deck, and owns me hardcore over a gravestone with Ichorid. Then I get pretty much the same sort of ownage by the guy sitting next to him playing Reanimator when he Renimates Avatar of Woe (Whoa!). It was disheartening, so I go talk to Dave a bit more and look in the case. I buy nothing. Justin gets there and I lend him some cards to fill out GrimLong. So many more insane players (namely Anthony) have to show up.

He gets there and registers and pairings go up shortly thereafter.

Round 1 – Counter Goblins

Basically, I get crushed. He drops an early Wooded Foothills so I immediately suspect Food Chain Goblins. However, Chalice of the Void at one does nothing against him. My lock pieces do not include Tangle Wire in game one, and in game two my sideboard Granite Shard kills one Lackey before getting shut off by Null Rod along with most of my mana. Against other things I might be able to stabilize, but Goblin Piledriver and Warchief come to play and kill me pretty quickly.

Later, when my opponent pretty much running the tournament, I find out that he’s got a variety of counters to go with his hordes. He never had to counter anything against me, though. I’m pretty sure that’s bad because it means I never threatened him at all.

Match 0-1-0; Games 0-2-0
Crud.

To make myself feel better I pretty much destroy Dover when he tries to use my UB Fish against UbaCaps. We start three games, finish two of them, I win all of them, and in the last two I get first turn Trinisphere. Those will be the only times I see that card early. Good thing they restricted it to non-tournament formats.

So, I dejectedly enter…

Round 2 – Ichorid

Lucky for me, this is not Vintage Ichorid expert Geoffrey Moes.

In the first game I catch him with Crucible-fueled land destruction early to keep Bazaars from doing anything. I Cap his Ashen Ghouls to get rid of his best non-Troll graveyard creatures (they’re black and recur just for mana) and proceed to win somehow. Both games are blurred together for me, and I might actually have capped him only in the second game, though I don’t know why I would have left it in.

I definitely bring in Granite Shards, Viashino Heretics, Trike, and Tormod’s Crypts.

Game two sees him short on mana and in a dead spot for recurring Ichorids. I get Bazaars going for myself and am threatening with Wastelands and Granite Shard. He finds a Pithing Needle and uses it on Goblin Welder. That’s a huge bonk since I clearly have three really, really good targets on the board for that Needle, two of which he can target without crippling himself as well. I get Ubazaar going, discard my two Welders, and play the Karn I draw. When I attack for seven with Uba Mask and Crucible, he scoops.

Ichorid is a rough deck to play, and probably after this tournament he’ll better know what hurts him. Goblin Welder is not it.

Match 1-1-0; Games 2-2-0

Round 3 – Severance-Belcher Gifts

His list looked pretty standard for Severance-Belcher when I capped him in the second game and took his win-conditions (Belcher, Darksteel Colossus, and Burning Wish). I think it’s a better list to run with Thirst for Knowledge, Pithing Needles, and Goblin Welder, though, because your win condition can be welded in along with a bunch of other broken artifacts.

In game one, I keep him off mana with Tangle Wires and playing around the Mana Drain I know he has in his hand (he told me). I get Ubazaar and Welder going and am unstoppable. He also scoops to Karn and an attack by Tangle Wire and Uba Mask.

I bring in all my Blasts and a Sundering Titan.

Game two, like I said, saw me Cap him for the win. My opening hand was Workshop, Cap, Welder, Mountain, Mox, REB, and another mana source, so I knew all I had to do was protect Cap or be able to weld it in and get the win. Welder goes in unscathed, I counter Gifts with REB, he Stifles my first Cap activation, I draw Pyroblast like a champ, weld in my Cap, and use it with back up.

Gifts just won’t get through a Cap activation unless it has a win condition in its hand.

Match 2-1-0; Games 4-2-0

Round 4 – Mark Trogdon’s Magical Workshops.dec

This was the only match that went to game three.

The first game totally flummoxed me. He went first, I think, and played Barbarian Ring and Welder, so I’m thinking it might be a mirror. I get some mana or something else ineffectual. I don’t remember what it was, but it must have sucked. Long story short: I don’t stop him from playing Synod Centurion and equipping it with O-Naginata. A creature that size is not something I want to have to deal with on short notice. I make him kill me just so I have more time to think about the sideboard.

Duh… I don’t know. I’m still thinking something Staxy, so I bring in Granite Shards and Tormod’s Crypts. It doesn’t matter, though, since I get Crucible-Strip Mine second turn on the play and am unstoppable. I’m pretty sure Karn finished this game for me too.

Karn is very good. I like him a lot. I need to remember he can eat Moxes, though.

Game three was ridiculous. I decide on my first turn that this game will be a No-Welder Zone with a Chalice for one. He plays Solemn Simulacrum and I summon up Duplicant to steal Jens’s identity, max out all his credit cards, and sleep with his wife. I get Duplicant beats in for six or seven turns before he gets his own Duplicant and gets beats in for five or six turns. Neither of us could seal the deal, however, and we went through our extra five turns without deciding a winner.

Match 2-1-1; Games 5-3-1

I’m in play for the top eight at this point. All I have to do is win my next match.

The big surprise, however, is still Counter Goblins, which has rolled over everyone for a perfect match record.

Round 5 – Nam with 5c Stax

Honestly, I have no idea how to play against Stax. With anything, not just UbaCaps. It’s nice that it doesn’t have counters, so I can pretty much throw my stuff out there with impunity. It’s not nice that the only times I’ve ever beaten Stax is with a turn one or two Energy Flux or a complete draw and control game based on Dark Confidant.

Nam is a professional. His Stax does nice things for him. Mine lets me Cap him for Welders within the first three turns. Okay? Then I pretty much die.

In game two, I am really excited to be on the play! I get out a Sphere of Resistance. He plays land, Mox, Mox. My game makes a downward spiral while his keeps climbing. He gets all kinds of lock pieces and I stare at my empty board. A couple of Triskelions show up for him and are my downfall.

That’s the end of my day.

Match 2-2-1; Games 5-5-1

How very middle-of-the-road. (Mediocrity FTD?)

I think I did okay. It being my first time with the deck. I definitely found some things I want to change, and I’m sure I picked up some strategies that I haven’t quite thought about outright. I believe I would definitely play this deck again, not in this environment, but I’d play it again. Ubazaar and Weldazaar both make me giggle because they’re both insane and awesome at the same time, like Steve Buscemi as the “Marietta Mangler,” Garland Greene.

Anyway, the tournament ended up looking like this:

Counter Goblins – Randall Taylor
Workshop Jank – Mark Trogdon
UbaStax – Jerry Yang
Ichorid – Jeff Moes
5c Stax – Anthony Michaels
5cUba Stax – Nam Tran
Food Chain Goblins – Jason Sharrock
Counterbalance-Top-Tog – David Goers

Overall, of the five decks in the tournament with Workshops, four of them made the top eight. Mine, uh, yeah mine was the only one that didn’t. C’est la vie.

Of the remaining decks, there were three combo decks with Dark Rituals, two Sullivan Solutions, one oath, no fish, and a Worse than Grow.

Not bad, eh?

We’ll have even better when we give away that Mox Sapphire in November.